To he who called me the Anna Nicole Smith of the English department

Cover of Playboy magazine, June 1993

It’s terrible the things I have
to do to be me. Vickie Lynn Hogan

is my birth certificate’s name.
If I have another child, I doubt

I’ll get married again. You never know
if they like you for who you are

or what you are. I get turned on
by liver spots. I don’t drink as much

as I used to could. I was an abused wife.
Nobody knows you.

I really think like I can do
something. I’m looking for anyone

with a job that I don’t have to support.
I can’t eat more than six hundred

dollars worth of food.
There was an ad in the paper

for playmates. I was so stupid.
I saw a very sick man. He was worth a lot.

I tried Red Lobster. I tried WalMart.
I tried all these places. A ghost

would crawl up my leg
and have sex with me at an apartment

a long time ago in Texas.
I’m just doing the best I know

how to. I spend my life
more and more alone. And for me

to come up and have all this fame
and fortune, it’s just.

I just love her. I just completely feel
what she went through.1

  1. All lines in this poem are rearranged Anna Nicole Smith quotes.